• Premiere: 8 & 9 July 2022 / City Theatre Main Stage / Pittsburgh, PA / Pittsburgh New Music Ensemble: Lindsay Kesselman & Kevin Noe, voices; Ian Rosenbaum, percussion; and Oscar Micaelsson, piano

• Commissioned by Pittsburgh New Music Ensemble

• Instrumentation: two voices, percussion (1 player), piano & fixed media

• Duration: 35’

• Text: drawn from interviews & anonymous submissions, adapted by the composer

ABOUT TRUST FALLS

There are truths that only reveal themselves in a place of trust, just as there is strength to be harnessed. Research reveals that trust is: unbreakable, fragile, constant, elusive, universal, and deeply personal; trust makes bold gestures possible and bolsters the courage necessary for time being quiet and still. Trust Falls, explores the deeply-human nature of what it is to ‘place confidence in,’ stitching together reflections shared in, and reaching toward, a place of trust.

Trust Falls, for soprano, baritone, percussion, piano, and fixed media, was commissioned by Pittsburgh New Music Ensemble for premiere on July 8 & 9, 2022 at City Theatre Main Stage in Pittsburgh, PA. The work is dedicated with warmth and gratitude to the performers, Lindsay Kesselman, Kevin Noe, Ian Rosenbaum, and Oscar Micaelsson.

TEXT

1. Trust is

Trust is 

Safety

Calm

Trust comes and goes.

Trust is like a fear of heights—the way it’s with you,

and then it’s gone

I’ve learned that trust is easy, sometimes

And sometimes it takes a long, long time

Trust is a place I am trying to reach

For every most important truth, trust has been my teacher

Trust is

I have learned to be watchful

I’ve learned to be quiet

I shy away from conflict

I make fun of myself in public

I’ve learned to look open while I put up my walls

I’ve learned vulnerability costs but it’s worth it

Trust is worth it

Trust is courage

Trust is risk

Safety

Calm

Trust comes and goes

Trust is earned

Trust is

I learned to trust in grace

Trust is a loosening of muscles around my heart space

Trust is

2. I am a little self-conscious

I am a little self-conscious about some things now

but I never used to be

and I’m lucky

that I got to not be self-conscious for so long.

3. …because of the peculiar nature of my childhood…

I dream sometimes of flying back to myself as a child.

I would hold my hand and say:

Be strong.

None of this is your fault.

Things will get better.

Trust that—just as you are—you are enough.

4. lift

5. Dragon Hymn

I wonder if maybe the world is just a little thing somewhere, under a dragon foot, or in a drop of rain on its back. Or maybe we are all inside of the snow, but we are somehow falling up.

6. la primera nevada

7. fierce guardians

If there was ever a time before words

at the start of everything

when all the universe was trust in grace,

in a center of safety, calm

in comfort

If we were lucky enough

to have been held and loved,

then that is the sacred gift

we cannot remember,

but that we trust is there

or was, even for a moment,

before words

at the start of everything.

8. Duérmase

9. Memory Prayer

I give thanks

I give thanks for

I remember

I stand in wonder

Have I been half asleep?

I’m awake now

I’m awake

Thank you

Text drawn from interviews and anonymous submissions; adapted by the composer.